Belated Merry Christmas and Boxing Day and Advance Happy New Year

I know, I know. It's been a while since I blogged. I haven't been neglecting blogging but since it's my favourite holiday, I'm pretty sure you all can forgive me.

I can't help it. I get excited everytime I go Christmas Lights hunting.

Or listening to Christmas Carols.

Or seeing Santa outside some houses with Rudolph.

Then renting out The Nightmare Before Christmas, Christmas with the Kranks, Bad Santa and other Christmas-sy movies. Okay, the nightmare before Christmas isn't really christmas-sy but it was one of my favourite movies growing up - yeah yeah, I'm weird.

Or waking up to see mum cooking up a storm.

Some things never change. Mum will wake up early morning on Christmas Eve to cook. Every year she makes Macaroni Chicken Salad. My absolute favourite in the world. That is the only food that can literally make me smile after just one bite. I'm not kidding. I love it that much.

And my mum makes the best Macaroni Chicken Salad.

Then she would ask me to help her wash the dishes [I'm not completely uselss, you know..] and prepare the veggies for her.

This year, we got invited to have a dinner party at Dimples' grandmother's house.

It was good but we had to go home as Uncle Lucio was very sleepy and we had to go to Sydney Nolan for the last time for the Christmas Lights.


I think you gave me the best surprise ever

Dear Mark,

Seeing you here in the Gold Coast made me realise that I still do care about you. It came as a shock when I saw you sitting on the couch at Jon's lounge but your familiar smile, your laugh and the way your eyes sparkle everytime you have something up your sleeves made me feel at home.

I wouldn't have any clue that you came up here to spend Christmas with everyone. You're a good guy with a good heart. Everytime I get myself halfway convinced that I'm cool with us being friends, you do something so incredibly thoughtful and my resistance wanes.

How is it that after a month of not speaking to each other. After a month of not emailing or not calling me, you still manage to put me as your top priority for Christmas? Only a few people surprise me but you have surprised me every single time you do a grand gesture.

I know what we have is something that a lot of people would call a very complicated relationship, but you and I both know that you can't fight the moment. And the time. We may not have ana normal relationship at the moment, but as you said, "we don't have to prove anything to anyone, it's just between you and me.."

And I believe you. It surprises me that I trust you with all my heart. That everytime you tell me not to worry, I don't worry. Everytime you tell me to relax, I do relax. And everytime you tell me that everything will be ok, I trust you.

A lot of things had happened this year. A lot of which weren't in our favour but it was life-changing nonetheless.

But somehow, the comfor that I get from knowing that you will always be there for me is something that will never go away.

Something that I will not let go, because you just proved to me that I am worth to you than anything else in the world.

And I think that least I can do is admit to myself that you are worthy to me too.

Thank you for everything that you've done. For being so patient, thoughtful, considerate, charming, funny and for being the person that you are.

I can't tell you enough how much you blow my mind. And I will keep on telling you that.

And I will keep on telling you that you are an amazing human being. Not only to me but to your friends [whom you help every single time they need it], to you parents [whom you call every single day from Sydney just to see how they're doing], to your colleagues, to Charlotte [your car that you take care so much], to Spanky [the cute little dog that hated me], to your cousins, to everyone that you've come across in your life.

And I'm not only one who thinks that you are amazing. You are too good of a person for me to just let you go. You take care of me so much that I feel useless when I'm not around you.

Thank you for everything and for making me feel happy during this time. We both know it's been difficult for us. But together, we actually got through it.

Love,

Nikki


I seriously need to go on a diet again

I'm been getting a lot of comments on how I've put on so much weight especially on the waist area.

On Christmas Eve, Jackie [Dimple's sister] and I had a fruit salad eating contest. It wasn't the type where people cheer you on til you finish the enormous bowl of fruit salad. It was more along the lines of neither of us wanted to stop eating.

There were a lot of food. Dimple's grandmother made Kare-kare, roast chicken, fruit salad and bibingka - a true filipino food that happened to be one of my favourites.

Mum brought Macaroni Chicken Salad, Sweet and Sour Pork, Fish Fillets, Caramel Pudding and Beef Stew.

I tried every single food that was on the table. Twice.

I didn't think I've eaten that much in my life. But Christmas always gives me a rather big appetite. Cos I know I have an excuse to binge - it's christmas, after all. It's ok.

Then on Christmas day, I had tacos, Spaghetti, Antipasto, prawns, pavlova, tiramisu, garlic butter bread, buttered chicken, morcon, sausage and onion, and roast chicken with gravy.

Uncle Lucio said I developed a huge donut around my waist.

Whatever, I'll start working out again after New Year's.


The Christmas that caught me by surprise

Coming home from the dinner party, I received a phone call from J.

Come over, let's go out, she said.

It's eleven o'clock, I protested.

So hurry, so we can celebrate christmas together, who knows who you'll kiss under a mistle toe tonight, she teased.

I sighed. Got dressed and drove over to where we were meant to meet - Jon's house.

As soon as I walked in, my eyes went straight to the person on the couch - Mark Hawes was in the Gold Coast.

He stood up and walked over towards me and gave me a hug.

Merry Christmas, he whispered. He bent over and gave me a kiss.

All I could do was stood there. I was too shock to return the hug and the kiss. My mouth was hanging open I looked like I was losing a chromosome.

We went to Jon's room to talk. I asked him what he was doing here.

Mum asked me to come over because of the whole tsunami last year, she wanted me to be close to her this year, he replied.

He is such a good boy.

We kissed on Midnight and for me, that was something really special.

Let's go out and greet everyone merry christmas, he said.

Ok, then why did you ask me to go to Jon's room if we were going out anyway, I asked.

Cos I wanted to kiss you on Midnight, he said with a smile.

Awwww....

Damn it, he made me ink again.

He always does it, he makes me ink then he leaves. But I fall for it every single time.