Not funny haha

I'm slowly realising that I'm not made to be a girlfriend just yet.

Because I get cranky on little things.

Like not being able to call me when he said he would.

Or not spending enough time together because of his busy schedule.

We've been seeing each other for three weeks and he thinks we're doing really well so I decided to test him.

I broke up with him on msn - but we're ok now.

I must admit, I didn't expect that tonight, he said.

Yeah, well me too, I replied.

So why say it then, he asked.

Because I feel like I should, I said.

Well that hurts, he said.

Why? I never really thought you liked me enough for you to get hurt, I said.

Well, that's not really the truth. I do, he answered.

What did I do though, he asked.

We both have different wants, I said.

I want to be with someone all the time and you can't give that at the moment, I added.

How's this, I'll train for extra two hours in the morning so I can have nights off with you, he compromised.

No, it's cool. We can catch up for coffee once in awhile if you want. We can be friends, I said.

I don't think that's possible, he answered.

Then he called me up.

He sounded really sad. Like almost on the verge of tears sad.

Umm.. Can you just forget what I said, I asked.

Yeah of course, he said.

He sounded relieved. Happy, even.

He's confusing me. He's great but I want more. I want him by my side every single time.

I want a daily dose of his now infamous bear hugs.

I want his arms wrapped around mine all the time.

I want to smell his scent before I go to bed.

But I can't.

And I know I should make sacrifices to make this work. And I'm doing it.

But somehow it's getting harder and harder for me to not spend time with him.

Because everytime I see him I'm liking him even more.